Six Steps for Successful Pacifier Play

Step 1: Once pacifier is in mouth and functioning properly, grasp with hand(s) and pull firmly until dislodged from mouth. Mouth may try to override hand. Keep pulling until hand wins.



Step 2: Grasp pacifier in hand and try to remember why you took it out in the first place.



Step 3: Remember that the pacifier is more fun in your mouth than in your hands. Decide to put pacifier back in. Struggle with step 3 for the next 2-5 minutes.



Step 4: Realize that pacifier doesn't seem to fit back in mouth the way it did when mom put it in. Try to look for alternate spots to insert pacifier.



Step 5: Remember that the round part goes in your mouth when mom puts it in. Can't... seem... to... fit... in... mouth... Decide to just lick it instead.



Step 6: This is just too hard! Forget it, I give up. Besides, once mom puts down that stupid camera thing, she'll put it back in for me.